Dear Edward, I Miss You
by KyF777
Summary: Bella is heartbroken and writes Edward a letter she never plans on him seeing. All-Human. One Shot for now, might add a couple more chapters but i dont know.
1. Miss You

**DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT, STEPHANIE MEYER DOES! **

**AN: Please no flames… this is kind of based off of stuff that's going on in my life right now. Thanks. Please leave a review though!**

**This is set when Edward and Bella are in about 10th grade. They are both human. Blla writes this and doesnt plan on sending it or ever letting him see it.**

_Dear Edward,_

_Do you even miss me? I doubt it. I see you every single day. We talk, we joke, and we smile. You don't realize that behind my smile is a broken heart, do you? Well honestly there is. Every day is a living nightmare. I hate seeing you and knowing that you aren't mine._

_It used to be so simple, being yours. I was so happy, every day was full of was so perfect… while it lasted. I still find myself thinking about that bus ride. Traveling with our friends on the way to our track meet. The whole way home sleeping on your shoulder and holding your hand. So perfect. My favorite memory of you. _

_We were what they called the perfect couple. Everywhere we went wet got compliments of how cute we were. How perfect we were. I miss that so much..I miss holding your hand as we walked down the halls at school together. I miss hugging you as we parted ways to go to our separate classes. I miss it all so much._

_What would you do if you knew that even after two and a half months of us being over that I'm still not over you? Would you say you're sorry and pull me close and tell me you made the biggest mistake ever by leaving me? Probably not, but I can dream right?_

_I have a plan you know? A plan to win you back.. it's probably a bad idea but hey it could work and I'm willing to do anything. The main part of the plan starts when I can drive.. only another year of this I hope.. I'm hopeless… _

_I'm trying to keep myself busy by for the mean time. It's not easy trust me but I'm trying my hardest. Edward, his name is Evan. We met last year. We were friends then I started to talk to him when we ended. He was just a relief from the pain of losing you at first. Then I realized maybe I felt something for him. Not as much as I felt for you but at least when I talk to him my pain is almost gone for a while._

_It's so weird talking to him and not having it be you. I miss you so much it's not even funny. You were so right for me. Then you were gone. I guess I did see it coming though.. that day when it happened… you were different. You didn't hold my hand when we walked to class like you always had before. You didn't hug me when you had to go to class. I had to get you to do those things. I was concerned but I didn't think too much of it. Now I realize I was right with my suspicions. _

_Edward, I want you back so bad. I don't know what I did that caused you to leave me. I just wish I knew the real reason. i asked you and you just said you weren't really ready for a relationship at the moment and wanted to just be friends with me. I heard from others that you said I had changed since we had started to be together. I wonder which one is true. _

_Edward, I miss you so much. Evan can't rid me of the pain I feel when I see you walking towards me and then right past me without saying hi to me. He just can't get rid of that. No one but you could. Part of me says I need to drop this whole thing but then I hear your name, or smell something and it smells like you or something and fall for you all over again. It sucks Edward. It really truly sucks._

_Why can't you see the pain I have to go through every day?_

_-I LOVE YOU EDWARD!_

_Love always,_

_Bella XOXO_

**THANK YOU FOR READING!:) **

**If you haven't read my other story Where Art Thou Romeo would you please go read it and leave a review? I want to get it finished but I need people to encourage me and so far im not getting anything…**

**Much love;**

**Kylee**


	2. Crazy

**DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN TWILIGHT, SEPHANIE MEYER DOES!**

_Dear Edward,_

_Its Christmas break and I haven't seen or talked to you in about a week now. _

_The other day our friends arranged an ice skating party and you were supposed to go. I guess something came up and I know I shouldn't have been sad but I admit I was a little disappointed in the fact that you didn't show up. _

_I even tried to look good while being all bundled up. Hard task but it might have worked if you had been there…_

_I talk to Evan all day everyday and If I didn't know any better id say I was over you._

_But I don't think I am. If I was over you I wouldn't have minded that you weren't there ice skating. If I was, I wouldn't be writing this letter would I? Probably not. _

_I can't really tell if I'm over you or not until Christmas Break is over and I see you for the first time in two weeks. Then I'll tell if I'm over you._

_I'm scared for that day. I want you back so bad. Maybe it's ok to move on… but I still have these feelings that make it so I DON'T want to move on. Maybe I'm trying to tell myself I'm over you and starting to believe it. Maybe I'm just lying to myself. _

_Why did you have to leave me? This is too hard for me to deal with._

_I want you back. That's what I want. I know I shouldn't, but I do._

_Im crazy. That's whats wrong with me. _

_Im sorry…_

_-Bella_

**I know its short and weird but hey you told me to write more and this is what came to mind!:)**

**Thanks for reading!**

**XOXO**

**Kylee**


	3. Love Hurts

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in this story, Stephanie Meyer does.**

_Dear Edward,_

_I haven't wrote to you since Christmas break. I guess I've been distracted. But now it's almost the end of January and I keep thinking of you._

_I like being your friend, trust me. I love it. I get to see you smile; I get to see you laugh. I get to see you be happy. I'm still desperately in love with you but I think I'm ok with just being friends right now. It's what you want so I'm ok with it I guess._

_I'd still give anything to be your girl. Stull wouldn't give it a second thought if you asked me to be yours again. I know the answer would be yes. I miss you so much…_

_I learned something new about you yesterday.. I thought I knew everything about you but I guess I didn't. This new thing.. It's the most important thing in the world to you. It's your piano. You were stressed out yesterday because of some surprise test that you were certain you failed. You went into one of the rooms behind the band room and played the piano in there for an hour straight. No one was allowed to hear you, just you and the music that flowed from your fingers. It was so sweet. I walked past that room while looking for someone and heard you playing. It was pure and perfect. Just you and your music. _

_I fell in love with you again. I don't know how you do it. I really don't. I think I'm over you one minute and the next you do some cute little thing that makes me realize I still really do care about you more than anyone before. _

_So… Evan. He's a good distraction and I honestly do like him, I just don't like him like I like you. I haven't liked anyone like I like you. How is it possible for it to be three months and eleven days since you broke up with me and I still have the same feelings I had all that time ago? _

_I guess I have stopped showing how much I still love you because Angela and I were talking and I said something about how sweet it is that you play piano when you're stressed and she asked me if I still like you. I guess that means my goal of not letting it show is working._

_Edward, I put up a mask when I'm around you and our friends, in hopes of anyone not seeing my true feelings. I think it's finally working and it is worth it. If I can see you be happy with your life I think it's worth it. _

_Edward, I still love you desperately. So much. And it still kills me every day. Why can't you just see that? If I took this mask I am hiding behind off, you would see a girl who isn't the girl that you met the very first time. You would see the new me. The one that still loves the guy who shattered her heart into a million little pieces. The me that doesn't know how to stop loving someone that hut her so badly that she won't ever be the same. _

_Edward.. please just realize it. Please? _

_I love you forever and always, even though it kills me  
>Bella<em>


	4. Hmmmmm

_Dear Edward,_

_You drive me CRAZY! Well I haven't written in a long while, right now it's the middle of May. _

_Why haven't I written? Cuz I got over the heartbreak. And it feels amazing. You are my best friend again (best male friend that is) and you can always make me smile._

_I t didn't happen quickly but one day I realized I didn't hurt like I did a few days before. I guess it just happened that way. I didn't hurt. And I was just happy to be your friend._

_Today we went to a party. It was Lauren's birthday party and we hung out and had fun and it was so amazing!_

_I dunno, I guess that even though it doesn't hurt, I still have feelings for you. I still love to see you smile. I still love to hear your laugh, to see your eyes light up when you're in a good mood. I love how we get into little "arguments" or "fights" and end up just laughing our butts off after wards. I love being one of your best friends. I hate seeing you in a bad mood and not being able to fix it. I hate knowing something is wrong and not knowing how to help._

_But most of all. I just love being one of your best friends. _

_I mean SURE I might still want to be with you a little still.. But you know what? I am ok with just being friends. I don't NEED to be with you. I guess I just am happy to be your friend. I should be too; I mean a lot of break ups end in a friendship being lost. I'm glad we weren't one of those couples. I'm glad we made it work._

_So, I'm ok. It feels great to say that. I'm ok. I get you in the end as a friend and that's all I need. I didn't lose you completely. You're still my best friend._

_3 Bella_

**Hey guys, **

**Sorry I haven't written in a while. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!:)**

**Not sure when ill update again but we'll see!:)**

**See ya next time!**

**Kylee**


	5. Thank You

_Dear Edward,_

_So yeah.. I dont really know what to say right now.._

_Its weird to write to you because now there is someone new. Yeah its Jacob haha_

_Its funny cuz i liked him for so long but never really knew it. He makes me really happy and im so lucky i have him._

_You know what i realized today? I realized that i owe a lot to you. I am actually sort of glad that you ended things between us. I mean now i have Jacob and that wouldnt have happened if i had still been with you. Does that make sense? _

_I mean sure it hurt a lot but in the end you are still one of my best friends in the world and i think of you as a brother. So its all good. And im happy._

_Thank you Edward. You have taught me so much about how to recover from heartbreak, how to move on, and how to be happy._

_So thank you. _

_Love you like my brother,_

_Bella_

**Hey guys! i want to take a minute to say THANK YOU for the amazing response i have gotten to this.**

**Yeah yeah i know its only 6 reviews but hey its still 6 more than i thought id get!**

**Thank You EXPECIALLY to 17canada94 cuz you have supported my through all of this! so thank you!**

**And as much as i love this story.. i think it might be the end of it? Maybe one or two more chapters laterr but for the most part this is the end i think:(**

**SO thanks again for reading!**

**LOVE YOU! **

**Kylee**


	6. AUTHORS NOTE PLEASE READ

**Authors Note:**

**I feel like i need to adress a couple of things.**

**First:**

**YES this story is catagorized as "Bella and Edward"  
>YES she ends up with Jacob in this story<br>NO I will not change it to "Bella and Jacob"**

**Why? Because its not a Bella and Jacob story ok? No its a story where Bella is heartbroken after Edward breaks up with her. THis story is about her and how she feels before during and after the break up. It is about how she copes and how she manages to be happy in the end. From the begining i never garenteed that Edward and Bella would get together ok? And also, The catagory "Bella and Edward" Doesnt mean they are together or that bella doesnt date other people in just means that Bella and Edward are the two main characters.**

**Second:**

**This story is a sensitive thing for me seeing as it is my own PERSONAL thoughts. I went through a rough break up in October and i was crushed. SO i worte this to help. And it did help. And you guys liked it so i kept writing. I wrote about how it hurt when he left, how it hurt when i tired getting over him and seeing him every single day and pretending everything was ok. I wrote about how even though i thought i was over him, when i saw him do something sweet, it made me fall for him all over again. I wrote about how even though he was one of my best friends i still had huge feelings for him but i knew i couldnt show them. And finally i wrote about how i moved on.**

**And Third:**

**YES i used Jacob as the guy she ends up with in the end. No I am NOT a team Jacob girl dont worry, i like Edward for sure. But you see, i HAD to use Jacob because as you know Jacob is Bella's best friend. And in real life i am dating my best friend. So see the point? I had to use Jacob to represent the truth like the rest of the story. **

**So i THINK that is it haha**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Kylee**


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